Prince is dead! Long live gender ambiguity!

I believe I was among the first to find out that Prince died. A friend posted as the news about a death in Paisley Park broke (and let's take a moment to raise a glass to the awesome name of the estate), and I watched coverage live as it was confirmed that it was indeed His Purpleness. That sucks; he was so very talented and way too young to die.

It's not like when David Bowie died and I received personal condolences from many; I wasn't that much of a Prince fan. But boy did I enjoy the hell out of his music, and I appreciated his eccentricity and his experimentation and his general vibe. And although I was aware that the symbol he used as The Artist Formerly Known as Prince was a combination of the traditional male and female symbols, it never seems to have entered my consciousness that like David Bowie, like the character Jo Polniaczek on The Facts of Life, Prince influenced my understanding of what I would now call gender fluidity. but among the coverage, I heard a reporter refer to Prince's gender-bending ways and compare him to David Bowie, and OF COURSE.


In retrospect, I started questioning gender norms when I was a small child. I recall finding it completely unfair that my father and brother could run around without shirts on when it was hot out, and yet I was not allowed to do so. I'm not exactly sure how old I was at the time; somewhere between five and ten, I think.

I now identify as gender-nonconforming/queer, although without a third option on a form, for example (and because sometimes I don't feel like entertaining questions), you'll find me identifying as female as well. I certainly grew up "female" with all the cultural experience that entails. And I am indeed straight-married to a fabulous hetero dude who is basically the stereotypical male; what's more, I do all the cooking and cleaning and laundry and whatnot. Though I still sometimes feel that my enjoyment of a stereotypical female role is a betrayal of my status as a queer feminist, the fact remains that I dig the hell out of my life, and it gives me the flexibility to write this stuff. If I wanted to do it differently, something would have to give.

But back to Prince. I do find it fascinating that in 2016, when the visibility of trans* identity and gender nonconformity is rising, we lose Bowie, and now Prince. The torch is passing. The next wave of the challenge of the gender binary continues.

On the other hand, I'm also coming to understand that although identifying as male or female is of no importance to me, it is to some, and I don't question those - whether cis or trans - who wish to identify as such.

Regardless, Perry Farrell remains the sexiest man alive.